My Good Friends

I've come to the realization that all my friends are better people than I am. I wouldn't have it any other way. They put up with my self-obsessing crap all the time, they are constantly looking out for others, and they are the funniest friggin people I've ever met. Who could ask for more? And so... I've wrote a bad haiku for my friends. Ahem:

My friends are funny
Jack Handey can't beat their wit
My brain is tired

Whoa, it took me WAAAAY too long to come up with that useless bit. I couldn't come up with the last line so I wrote the default. Even when I was in 8th grade I wrote this poem about the artesian well down the street the night before it was due. The last line went "Blue is the color of this poem that I write, this lyrical poem that I thought of last night." A totally random sentence, but my teacher thought it was brilliant so I figure another random sentence might do the trick.

I'm finding that losing weight is an expensive business. Not only did I pay the low, low price of $12,950 for my surgery, but now I'm having to buy new clothes all the time. In another couple of years I'll be ready for a tummy-tuck - another expense to losing weight. So I'm wondering why I ever gained in the first place? Did I not understand the economic implications? Apparently I was just focused on the brownie sundae instead of the dollar signs in front of me. Food is evil.